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Thread: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

  1. #261
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by FadeToBlack&Gold View Post
    We also made sure they're being brought in on old school buses (sleepers are much too fancy for this event), and that the drivers took as many rutted dirt roads as possible.
    Are they heated? Or was there not enough time to situate that?
    It was an honor to present your colors, RPI. Let's Go 'TUTE!
    May 14th, 2011, 11:00 PM ET: 2147483647

    "Better to be infamous than never famous at all." -Roger Stone

    Quote Originally Posted by French Rage View Post
    Ahh crap I agree exactly with what FlagDude said.
    Quote Originally Posted by Handyman View Post
    And yet, even if Flaggy is complete tinfoil hat, every day it looks closer and closer to the truth.
    Quote Originally Posted by burd View Post
    So flaggy: you win.

  2. #262
    If Only You Knew MissThundercat's Avatar
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by FlagDUDE08 View Post
    Are they heated? Or was there not enough time to situate that?
    Heated? *spits out coffee* HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAH!
    twitter: PipersHouse920, instagram: bobambermarie
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  3. #263
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by MissThundercat View Post
    I'll go back and edit. Here:

    MARS for December:

    1. UAA (WCHA AQ)
    2. Ferris
    3. Holy Cross (Atlantic Hockey AQ)
    4. Colgate
    5. New Hampshire (Hockey East AQ)
    6. Vermont
    7. Bentley
    8. Alabama Huntsville
    9. Omaha (NCHC AQ)
    10. Michigan State (Big 10 AQ)
    11. RPI
    12. SLU (ECAC AQ)
    13. Alaska
    14. Merrimack
    15. Sacred Heart
    16. Dartmouth

    Bubble


    Colorado College
    Michigan
    RIT
    At first I thought no team would show up to this, but in NCAA Basketball they do, it's called the NIT

  4. #264
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by Go___Tech_Gold View Post
    At first I thought no team would show up to this, but in NCAA Basketball they do, it's called the NIT
    Wish we could have a real historic Toilet Bowl, MTU 1999-2000 (4-34) vs UAH 2013-2014 (2-35)

  5. #265
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by Go___Tech_Gold View Post
    At first I thought no team would show up to this, but in NCAA Basketball they do, it's called the NIT
    That's more of a waaah-mbulance tournament, though. This is closer to football's Toilet Bowl (not to be mistaken with a long standing tradition in a location I've been known to frequent).
    It was an honor to present your colors, RPI. Let's Go 'TUTE!
    May 14th, 2011, 11:00 PM ET: 2147483647

    "Better to be infamous than never famous at all." -Roger Stone

    Quote Originally Posted by French Rage View Post
    Ahh crap I agree exactly with what FlagDude said.
    Quote Originally Posted by Handyman View Post
    And yet, even if Flaggy is complete tinfoil hat, every day it looks closer and closer to the truth.
    Quote Originally Posted by burd View Post
    So flaggy: you win.

  6. #266
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Presenting the first Northern Winter Solstice ("NoWinS") Bottom Feeder Classic, to be played starting at 1:38am MST on December 21 with the Alabama-Huntsville vs Omaha semifinal. They will be followed by St. Lawrence vs New Hampshire.

    The teams are flying to El Paso, TX where they will meet their airport shuttle for the 109 mile transport to Alamagordo, NM. From there, local residents with pickup trucks will ferry them the final 21 miles to Cloudcroft. The Chargers and Mavericks will be on the first shuttle, which will immediately return to El Paso to then bring the Saints and Wildcats to arrive three hours later.

  7. #267
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by FlagDUDE08 View Post
    That's more of a waaah-mbulance tournament, though. This is closer to football's Toilet Bowl (not to be mistaken with a long standing tradition in a location I've been known to frequent).
    With 68 teams in the basketball NCAA Tournament, NIT is a "best of the worst" Tourney just like this one, the top seed is #65 in the nation (approximately, given conference autobids). According to PairWise, the 2-13-1 UAA Seawolves are #59 in the nation (out of 60)

  8. #268
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Someone thinks this is a real thing, and that we would use things like "facts" and "logic" while making decisions.

    Can't help this person.
    twitter: PipersHouse920, instagram: bobambermarie
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
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  9. #269
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by MissThundercat View Post
    Someone thinks this is a real thing, and that we would use things like "facts" and "logic" while making decisions.

    Can't help this person.
    The NIT is also a make believe tournament. The "winner" is the 69th best team in the nation.

  10. #270
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Game Recap - Semifinal #1 of the Inaugural Northern Winter Solstice (NoWinS) Classic from Cloudcroft, NM

    UAH Chargers vs Omaha Mavericks

    The teams arrived in their pickup truck shuttles at 1:28am MST for the 1:38 scheduled faceoff, as specified by the Commish. With temps hovering right at the freezing mark, ice conditions were sketchy. Controlled burns by the National Park Service also left a choking haze over the rink. The teams were also presented with two house rules for the tournament – no player was permitted to play his listed position, and each player was required to use a stick not made for their hand (i.e. lefties have to play with a right handed curve).

    First period
    Omaha took the first four shots of the period, only to figure out later that they were shooting at a discarded skating aid left by the previous public skating session. Temporary UAH goalie Levi Wunder took the opportunity to chat with locals about the intricacies of the shelter over the ice surface. No one scored a goal.

    Second period
    After the teams scraped the ice in the intermission, they were forced to wait for the Cloudcroft Light Opera Company to re-enact the first period. Omaha used the distraction to smuggle a second puck onto the ice near the UAH goal, and when play began they poked it across the line while hiding the actual puck. Since they had not seen the play to re-enact it, the CLOC was not able to help the officials who allowed the goal. 1-0 Mavericks after 2.

    Third period
    Choked by the smoke and altitude, both teams slowed to a crawl. Late in the period, Wunder flipped a puck up into the girders above the ice. All the players lost track of the puck until it rolled past temporary Omaha goalie Teemu Pulkkinen and into the net. Upon watching the CLOC re-enactment that pointed out the girders were in play, the goal stood. While Omaha vehemently protested, UAH pulled the same hidden second puck trick and this time placed it in the net. With 43.8 seconds left, all the Chargers crashed the crease with all the Mavericks and a UAH player pocketed the actual puck. When all were unpiled, the second puck appeared in the net. The goal stood, making the final 2-1 UAH and advancing Omaha to the final.

    Recap of semifinal #2 soon.

  11. #271
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Game Recap – Semifinal #2 of the Inaugural Northern Winter Solstice (NoWinS) from Cloudcroft, NM

    St. Lawrence Saints vs New Hampshire Wildcats

    Upon arrival at the James Sewell Ice Rink in Zenith Park, UNH coach Mike Souza was informed by exiting Huntsville players about the house rules for the tournament. Souza immediately changed his roster to list individual forwards as centers and wings, with the intent to still use them up front. The ensuing argument with tournament officials was re-enacted by the CLOC and announced as the new original show for the next month in the town theater. UNH was assessed a bench minor to start the game.

    First period
    SLU peppered the UNH goal with their opening power play and scored three times in the opening 4 minutes. At that point, the UNH bench realized that using the wrong handed stick still meant playing with the blade on the ice, rather than the knob. The Wildcats stabilized, but still trailed 3-0.

    Second period
    The Wildcats pulled out their secret weapon after the ice scrape – each player skated with a Dick Umile whistle in his mouth and blew it whenever the Saints touched the puck. SLU players were so annoyed they stopped touching the puck, allowing UNH to score twice and trail by a goal after 2.

    Third period
    UNH tied the game soon after the last period began. But the effects of the smoke, the altitude, and the whistles left the Wildcats winded as the clock wound down. With no fans attending, the lone worker in the adjoining snack bar decided to eat all the prepped food he could instead. He managed to choke down all but one burnt burger pattie, which he discarded onto the ice surface. St. Lawrence played it as a puck and scored, and after a lengthy re-enactment the officials let the goal stand, giving a 4-3 victory to the Saints and advancing UNH to the title game.

    Miss Thundercat will have the recap of the championship game later.
    Last edited by John J. MacInnes; 12-21-2018 at 02:34 PM.

  12. #272
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by John J. MacInnes View Post
    Presenting the first Northern Winter Solstice ("NoWinS") Bottom Feeder Classic, to be played starting at 1:38am MST on December 21 with the Alabama-Huntsville vs Omaha semifinal. They will be followed by St. Lawrence vs New Hampshire.

    The teams are flying to El Paso, TX where they will meet their airport shuttle for the 109 mile transport to Alamagordo, NM. From there, local residents with pickup trucks will ferry them the final 21 miles to Cloudcroft. The Chargers and Mavericks will be on the first shuttle, which will immediately return to El Paso to then bring the Saints and Wildcats to arrive three hours later.
    I think they should have a free for all drive, like from the movie, "Used Cars"

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crZy2FMAD5w
    XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX


    The reason for the talent in the west? Because MN didn't rely on Canada.

    Quote Originally Posted by MN Pond Hockey View Post
    Menards could have sold a lot of rope

    this morning in Grand Forks if North Dakota had trees.

  13. #273
    If Only You Knew MissThundercat's Avatar
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Your game recap is coming later, but Allsup's is providing more food. I got them to provide rancid breakfast sandwiches for about $20.

    Before the final later, John J. MacInnes and I are going to a nearby town for actual food and beer. What, you thought we were going to eat what the gas station provides?
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    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
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  14. #274
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    Quote Originally Posted by MissThundercat View Post
    Your game recap is coming later, but Allsup's is providing more food. I got them to provide rancid breakfast sandwiches for about $20.

    Before the final later, John J. MacInnes and I are going to a nearby town for actual food and beer. What, you thought we were going to eat what the gas station provides?
    Nearby town? And that was the last we heard from MacInnes and thundercat.

  15. #275
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Northern Winter Solstice ("NoWinS") tournament Championship Recap: Omaha vs. New Hampshire

    First Period
    Omaha and New Hampshire started scrapping right off the opening puck drop. Ryan Galt of Omaha and Anthony Wyse of New Hampshire, leaders of their teams in penalty minutes, tangled up right away. Both coaches put their goons out for the start, and these two started throwing haymakers. After a lengthy brawl, Galt dropped Wyse with a hard right. Refs, which we pulled from local watering holes, gave both 5 and a game. With about 7:30 left in the period, Ara Nazarian of New Hampshire managed to bank a shot off the rear glass, off Evan Weninger's back, and in. CLOC gave it a good review, and the goal counted. With 1 minute to play in the first, Mason Morelli of Omaha tied it up with a shot that went in off Mike Robinson's (UNH) shoulder pads. The teams would get into it again, and the period ended tied at 1.

    First Intermission
    Mike Souza went in the dining area to get a breakfast sandwich and some coffee. He didn't like the sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit, but he managed to eat the entire thing. Evan Weninger was seen puking up his breakfast sandwich, and was screaming for some Gatorade. All we have to drink is some lukewarm coffee.

    Second Period
    With ice conditions worsening, players struggled to move. Smoke made for a hazy arena, and several players asked to remove their skates and ask to play in their sneakers. Miss Thundercat was there to hear their complaints, and as she sipped from her travel mug of Bourbon and chocolate chili liqueur, she laughed at the players' requests and said they needed to play on. Sluggish conditions persisted, and late in the second, with about 2 minutes remaining, Liam Blackburn went in on Weninger, and managed to poke it through a hole in the side of the net. The CLOC review showed it was a no goal, and the period ended tied at 1.

    Second Intermission
    Mike Gabinet of Omaha had a lengthy discussion with Souza about all of this being laughable, and a joke, and "this is the last time they do this." Tournament officials (JJM and Miss Thundercat) were nearby when they heard this, and told the two teams to get out of the basement of their respective conferences. CLOC observed this, and re-enacted the conversation. Miss Thundercat was done with her booze, and pulled out some New Holland Dragon's Milk to share with her fellow official.

    Third Period
    With teams feeling worse from the altitude and the smoke, and both coaches hanging their head in shame, the teams played on. Zach Jordan of Omaha dumped the puck in, and there was Angus Crookshank of UNH standing in front of Mike Robinson. The puck tipped off Crookshank's stick, and in. Crookshank knew it right away, and broke his stick right on the "ice." CLOC re-enacted the scene two or three times, making Souza yell to get CLOC off the ice. We let them play on. Omaha led 2-1 with 13 minutes to play. Crookshank was looking for redemption after the own goal, and after pulling a few Sean Avery-style tactics in front of Weninger, he tied it up with an assist from Blackburn with 5 minutes remaining. After the game, Crookshank told us that he regretted nothing. Tied at 2 with 1:30 remaining, Weninger of Omaha sent the puck down the ice. But Souza dropped a sausage patty from a breakfast sandwich on the ice, leading to some confusion. Marcus Vela took the patty, ran it down toward Weninger, and got it in the back of the net. At the same time, on the other side of the ice, Tristan Keck of Omaha put the actual puck past Robinson. The refs relied on CLOC, and were able to tell the difference between vulcanized rubber and a burned sausage patty. Keck's goal counted first. UNH would get a few more shots on Weninger, but the game ended 3-2 Omaha.

    Post-game
    Mike Souza was seen taking the NoWinS Trophy, really just a plastic trash can with crossed sticks and a puck on top, and burning it.

    This was fun.
    twitter: PipersHouse920, instagram: bobambermarie
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
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  16. #276
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    With the Northern Winter Solstice (NoWinS) tournament behind us, and a successful one at that, I am looking forward to the second half of the season.

    Will RPI and SLU go back to sucking full time? They were front-runners for the Futile Four at the start of the season.

    How many people will forget that the committee doesn't care what they think?

    How many people will I have to send out for coffee and a breakfast sandwich because they thought I cared what they think?

    How much coffee will I need to buy Fade, GFM, and John J. MacInnes for helping this year?
    twitter: PipersHouse920, instagram: bobambermarie
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    Adventures With Amber Marie

  17. #277
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    All the coffee!

  18. #278
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by FadeToBlack&Gold View Post
    All the coffee!
    Sweet! There might be a breakfast sandwich in there too for you.
    twitter: PipersHouse920, instagram: bobambermarie
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    Adventures With Amber Marie

  19. #279
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    Quote Originally Posted by MissThundercat View Post

    How much coffee will I need to buy John J. MacInnes for helping this year?
    Good news for you, I'm not a coffee drinker. More for Fade and GFM.

  20. #280
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    Re: Bottom Feeders 2018-19: Just So You Know, They Really Suck

    What an exciting tournament to kick off (or should it be face oof) the 2nd half of the season. Those traditional tourneys that start this weekend will undoubtedly be jealous of the Solstice experience in scenic, but smoky/hazy Cloudcorift,
    And a "burning" question was answered. A burnt hamburger patty is more likely to be mistaken for a hockey puck than a burnt breakfast sausage patty.

    Without even witnessing the reenactments by the CLOC, Bringing theater to the rink is so much more entertaining than watching 2 striped shirts staring at a tiny monitor for indefinite periods of time.

    Miss Thundercat I commend you for not succumbing to alcohol induced altitude sickness which is very common among flatlanders.
    GO DU !!!

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