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huskyfan
03-27-2010, 07:07 PM
tall pylon and sawhorse have seen alot of action this year for Tech.

so the coin collector is in goal?

Freddie
03-27-2010, 10:03 PM
Saugus MA: Robert Morris 13, Holy Cross 1 Plenty of pundits didn't think Robert Morris belonged in this tournament, and the Colonials proved them right with a 13-1 shellacking of Holy Cross. With seven of Bobby Mo's ten wins this season coming at the expense of teams that earned berths in that 'other tournament', many thought their inclusion in the field reeked of eastern bias.

All twenty players, including both goaltenders earned points in the lopsided victory that ends Robert Morris' season and sends Holy Cross to the Regional Chumpionship. A stunned crowd of fourteen barely had time to find their seats before this game was over, as the Crusader's porous defense allowed four goals in the first 1:30 of the game.

The lone Holy Cross tally was credited to their volunteer assistant equipment manager Seymore Erckle who fell off the bench during the second period. Apparently, Erckle's shoe laces had been tied together as a prank causing him to fall over the boards.

Mercyhurst 1, Niagara 0 (6OT) The longest game in BFB history ended abruptly when Niagara's backup goaltender Andrew Hare fell asleep 3:25 in to the sixth twenty minute overtime period. The game winner came off the stick of freshman defenseman Alex Gallen (his first collegiate point) and was the first Laker shot on goal since late in the first period of regulation.

The flow of the game was slowed since the ice making plant had not been functioning since the second intermission of the first game. A disgruntled former employee of HockeyTownUSA is being sought by Saugus Police, and is expected to be charged with criminal mischief, trespassing and public urination.

Holy Cross and Niagara will advance to Sunday morning's regional chumpionship game, and a berth in the FutileFour

Freddie
03-27-2010, 11:10 PM
Massena NY: Western Michigan 5, Bentley 1
When Bentley head coach Ryan Soderquist stormed in to his team's makeshift lockerroom after the first period, he was a raging bull. Just next door, Western's acting head coach Marc Falker wasn't any happier. Soderquist's booming voice was heard clear across the St Lawrence Center Mall concourse, as a startled staffer at the Missy's Ear Emporium kiosk sliced the left lobe off an equally startled customer. "(Expletive deleted) we have not choked and gagged all season to get here, just to let it all slip away now."

Both teams played exceptionally well is a game that was hard hitting, fast paced and would have been entertaining to the fans if there had been any. The 1-1 score and 12-12 shot totals were proof that this was not action fitting to the BFB. "A total sham" according to Falker. "This is not what anybody has any reason to expect in this event."

Soderquist then hit on a strategy that is bound to have repercussions when the tournament committee next meets to discuss possible rules changes for next season. He quickly rounded up a group of pre-teen girls from the mall, dressed them in his player's uniforms, and sent his new "team" out to play the final 40 minutes.

Western managed to score twice in the second period before recruiting their own replacement players for the final stanza. The Western recruits (the "Knitting Bees" from Sunnyside Retirement Home) scored twice themselves, and the Broncos see their season come to an end.

Dartmouth 1, Bowling Green 0
BG's interim head coach Dennis Williams has been here before, but even he was awed by the stunning display of ineptitude. "Nobody did anything right; not the teams, not the officials, certainly not the committee. Spencer Gifts even misspelled the obscene t-shirts."

How ugly was it? The arena staff set the goals backwards, and nobody noticed until midway through the third period. Dartmouth's goal scored when a shot missed the net, bounced off the back board and entered the goal from behind.

Bentley and Bowling Green advance to Sunday's Regional Chumpionship

Eaglefan06
03-27-2010, 11:16 PM
Now that is dedication Coach Soderquist.

Bring home the hardware!

bigblue_dl
03-28-2010, 05:44 AM
no resluts from the tech game? fail.

Yager
03-28-2010, 06:33 AM
no resluts from the tech game? fail.
x2. I've been up all night waiting for a telegram detailing how the game went.

huskyfan
03-28-2010, 09:31 AM
communications difficulties, no doubt. dropped his cellphone in the urinal or some such.

Freddie
03-28-2010, 11:28 AM
Laurium MI: Princeton 3, UConn 0 The Princeton Tigers played their way out of the BFB with a well executed game plan and a spot of luck. Thenty-six bench minors against UConn for too many men on the ice, left the Huskies shorthanded repeatedly, including seven 5 on 3 opportunities.

Having eaten several Turnip & Buck Testicle Pasties, backup goalie Brad McInnis kept the UConn bench in a fog of the foulest flatulence this reporter has even witnessed. Huskie players routinely were forced to flee the bench, often during play, resulting in the repeated penalties.

UConn head coach Bruce Marshall was evasive when asked if McInnis' pre-game meal was part of a game day strategy, or just good fortune. "I'll just have to leave that to your imagination." Marshall continued "if you want to give us that much credit...you know...for being able to anticipate the effects of those pasties...we'd be foolish not to take the credit...but on the other hand if we had that kind of smarts, how did we get here?"

Princeton's Guy Gadowsky joins the very short list of coaches to guide two different teams to the BFB, having brought Alaska-Fairbanks on that trip ten years ago. "As a player at Colorado College, I never could even dream of having an opportunity to play in an event of this stature...and being fortunate enough to make it here ten years ago with Fairbanks, well that was a low-light of my career. This trip was even more special...even though we won't be advancing, it's a memory that will stay with me forever."

Harvard 2, Army 1 Army's failure to convert on a full five minutes of 5 on 3 powerplay proved to be the deciding factor in this lackluster exhibition of skill-free competition. Harvard teammates and brothers Michael and Alex Biega were sent off for fighting at 13:25 of the third period, when a family dispute that has been festering for twelve years finally boiled over. It seems Michael has never forgiven Alex for the atomic wedgie the elder brother had administered as part of a hazing process when they were "squirts".

"I glanced over toward Mikey as we were getting set for a faceoff, and he was grinning at me" said Alex "I knew what he was thinking...This might be the last time we play together." "That's right," Michael responded in the post-game press conference "I've been waiting twelve years for the right time to kick his arse...as soon as we made eye contact, we both knew it was time to drop 'em and get at each other."

UConn will face Army early Sunday morning in the Regional Chumpionship, assuring Atlantic Hockey at least one berth in the FutileFour.

Freddie
03-28-2010, 08:26 PM
Moscow ID: Providence 16, American International 14
It was as if both teams had spies in each other's camp, as Providence and AIC came out with identical game-day strategies. Each team started the game with six attackers and no goalie, in what often resembled a cutthroat game of pond hockey. AIC's longtime head coach Gary Wright is no stranger to BFB play, having qualified in each of the last seventeen seasons. PC's Tim Army poised to start his own streak with the Friars, has proven a quick study in BFB tactics.

"I've always thought that way too much was emphasis was placed on goaltending" Army said. "I've wondered for years why nobody ever tried playing an entire game with an empty net. This seemed the perfect opportunity to give it a try. Imagine my surprise when I saw them employing the same tactic."

"In hindsight, I suppose we ought to have shot the puck more," said Wright "but its tough to change your entire offensive philosophy in one game."

Tied at 5 after the first, and at 11 at the second intermission; the game had the flow of a boulder in a glacier...rocky and slow, until AIC went for a change of tactics. Leading 14-13 with 4:56 to go, the Yellow Jackets inserted 3rd string goalie Jake Anderson (5.60gaa, .793 spct). Anderson allowed three goals in the next 90 seconds, and defeat was snatched from the jaws of victory once again.

Clarkson 4, Michigan Tech 3
In any normal sixteen tournament bracket, that 8 v 9 match-up ought to be a dandy game. But anything can happen in the BFB. Anything, including (apparently) an outstanding hockey match.

Several local residents were quite vocal in their disappointment. "What little we had heard about this event led us to believe we would be watching a comedy of errors" said Latah County rancher Shane Brokeback. "I feel cheated, and a bit dirty."

Acting BFB Committee Chair Francis Bedwetter has pledged a full investigation. "At this point we're not sure how it happened, but we will get to the bottom if it. I'd like to believe that it was just two bad teams very evenly matched, but there may be more to it than that."

American International faces Michigan Tech for regional chumpionship

bigblue_dl
03-29-2010, 09:44 AM
Clarkson 4, Michigan Tech 3
In any normal sixteen tournament bracket, that 8 v 9 match-up ought to be a dandy game. But anything can happen in the BFB. Anything, including (apparently) an outstanding hockey match.

Several local residents were quite vocal in their disappointment. "What little we had heard about this event led us to believe we would be watching a comedy of errors" said Latah County rancher Shane Brokeback. "I feel cheated, and a bit dirty."

Acting BFB Committee Chair Francis Bedwetter has pledged a full investigation. "At this point we're not sure how it happened, but we will get to the bottom if it. I'd like to believe that it was just two bad teams very evenly matched, but there may be more to it than that."

American International faces Michigan Tech for regional chumpionship
I'm happy to advance, but sometimes its just not worth it, when you can't do it the right way. :mad:

Freddie
03-29-2010, 09:58 AM
BFB Regional Chumpionships completed, field for FutileFour filled! A perfect storm of snafus delayed the reporting of results, but it now appears to all be sorted out. BFB Director of Communications Alicia Bell (no relation) has accepted full responsibility for the problems which kept our on-site reporters from filing their results in a timely manner. "None of our reporters could find a pay phone, in fact one of them didn't even know what a phone booth was. Our normal procedure has been to issue each reporter with $20 in quarters, and have them call from a pay phone."

Saugus MA; Holy Cross 7, Niagara 6
A furious comeback by the Niagara Purple Eagles fell just short, and assures that the lame-duck CHA will be represented in the FutileFour. Holy Cross worked hard to build a 7-1 lead as the Niagara team all overslept and did not arrive until the second intermission.

Massena NY; Bentley 2, Bowling Green 0
Offensive incompetence abounded in this epic battle of Falcons. Bentley's first period goal appeared to deflect off the paper mache Easter bunny hanging from the rafters, and probably should have been waved off, but the ECAC officiating crew proved themselves worthy of their BFB assignment by allowing it to stand. Bentley added an empty netter in the closing seconds to seal BG's fate. The two teams combined for 9 shots on goal through the entire sixty minutes of play.

Laurium MI; Army 6, UConn 0
Trailing 4-0 at the end of the second period, UConn decided to accept the inevitable and simply didn't return to the ice for the third period. Army overcame their initial confusion at the total lack of opposition, and added two markers to close the deal. UConn's Bruce Marshall explained his decision to leave early "We wanted to beat the southbound traffic, and wanted to get our roller skates returned early enough to avoid an extra day's rental."

Moscow ID; Michigan Tech 4, AIC 2
AIC took an early lead on two nearly identical first period plays, as Tech's goalie mishandled passes back from his own defensemen. The errant own-goals gave the YellowJackets confidence that they might be able to avoid another trip to the FutileFour, but their confidence waned as the Huskies mounted a relentless barrage of six shots on goal over the final forty minutes of play.

Game time schedules are still pending for this weekend's FutileFour semifinals in Flowood Mississippi, but the match-ups are set:

Bowling Green (5-27-6) vs. Connecticut (7-29-3)
Niagara 12-22-4 vs. American International (5-26-4)

huskyfan
03-29-2010, 10:05 AM
sad to see Tech out. :(

the communications for this tournament have been abysmal. something must be done for next year. letter writing perhaps? it would save money ...

Proud2baLaker
03-29-2010, 01:24 PM
sad to see Tech out. :(

the communications for this tournament have been abysmal. something must be done for next year. letter writing perhaps? it would save money ...

telegraph would seem appropriate. or smoke signals.

Rand
03-29-2010, 01:53 PM
There is an aquantaince of mine who does ocassional, and somewhat sporadic freelance reporting for a nationally renowned (and somewhat sarcastic parody) newspaper that always brings tears to the eye...

Who, knowing I am an avid college hockey fan, asked me to check into the rumor, that, outside the rink in Laurium, MI, there were protests that nearly broke out into a full scale riots among rival P.E.T.A. groups (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, and People Eating Tasty Animals) over the Turnip and Bull testicle pasties....

Can (or will) the BFB/Futile Four Committee comment on this rumor??

Jon
03-29-2010, 02:39 PM
PC's Tim Army poised to start his own streak with the Friars, has proven a quick study in BFB tactics.

Hokydad's resents your negativity. You area clown!

crazytechfan
03-29-2010, 02:39 PM
There is an aquantaince of mine who does ocassional, and somewhat sporadic freelance reporting for a nationally renowned (and somewhat sarcastic parody) newspaper that always brings tears to the eye...

Who, knowing I am an avid college hockey fan, asked me to check into the rumor, that, outside the rink in Laurium, MI, there were protests that nearly broke out into a full scale riots among rival P.E.T.A. groups (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, and People Eating Tasty Animals) over the Turnip and Bull testicle pasties....

Can (or will) the BFB/Futile Four Committee comment on this rumor??

As the chair of the George Gipp Welcoming Committee, I am pleased to say that the PETA groups have come to an agreement. Both sides finally came to the conclusion that the pasties are alright with them, as the latter gets the "tasty" taken care of with said testicles, and the former gets the "meat alternatives" taken care of with the turnips.

drshoen
03-29-2010, 02:39 PM
Moscow ID: [B]Clarkson 4, Michigan Tech 3
In any normal sixteen tournament bracket, that 8 v 9 match-up ought to be a dandy game. But anything can happen in the BFB. Anything, including (apparently) an outstanding hockey match.

Several local residents were quite vocal in their disappointment. "What little we had heard about this event led us to believe we would be watching a comedy of errors" said Latah County rancher Shane Brokeback. "I feel cheated, and a bit dirty."

Acting BFB Committee Chair Francis Bedwetter has pledged a full investigation. "At this point we're not sure how it happened, but we will get to the bottom if it. I'd like to believe that it was just two bad teams very evenly matched, but there may be more to it than that."

American International faces Michigan Tech for regional chumpionship

Clarkson plays like garbage all season, then picks NOW to start winning?:( :(

Freddie
03-29-2010, 02:59 PM
There is an aquantaince of mine who does ocassional, and somewhat sporadic freelance reporting for a nationally renowned (and somewhat sarcastic parody) newspaper that always brings tears to the eye...

Who, knowing I am an avid college hockey fan, asked me to check into the rumor, that, outside the rink in Laurium, MI, there were protests that nearly broke out into a full scale riots among rival P.E.T.A. groups (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, and People Eating Tasty Animals) over the Turnip and Bull testicle pasties....

Can (or will) the BFB/Futile Four Committee comment on this rumor??

Our attorney has advised us to refrain from making any public statement about any possible incident which may or may not have occured.

crazytechfan
03-29-2010, 03:00 PM
Our attorney has advised us to refrain from making any public statement about any possible incident which may or may not have occured.

Of course, the GGWC is not associated with the FFC committee, so we DO WHAT WE WANT.

Beer Pong Horn
03-29-2010, 03:09 PM
Of course, the GGWC is not associated with the FFC committee, so we DO WHAT WE WANT.

The Kenner Dome Welcoming Committee slept with your mom. Betcha didn't know your dad was the sole committee member now.