Re: The 2018 My Team Got the Shaft from the NCAA Thread
In related news- Utica College just went on lockdown. Seriously.
In related news- Utica College just went on lockdown. Seriously.
Scene: [Heavy smoke filled room. Camera pans back enabling viewers to discern a table and a handful of men, some with hands on head, some punching computer keys.] Man #1 [James, staring into monitor]: “Ok, so the primary criteria metrics favor Oswego for the last pool C slot.” Man #2 [Leonard]: “Dammit Jim, we’re humans, not computers and a few of us have trouble with a team getting in while losing their last three on home ice while only scoring one goal late in the last game.” Man #3 [S.T.]: “Agreed, computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them. Logic and practical information do not seem to mesh here but what other answer is there? Trinity? They failed just as well.” Man #4 [Montgomery]: “Aye, if they had only won yesterday this would have bloody been a wee bit easier!” Man #5 [Chris]: “What about Utica? They won both regular and post season, beat Salve, had Oswego beat and took Adrian to the wire there.” Montgomery [shaking]: “Aye, the haggis is in the fire for sure!!” James [pounding on table]: “Gentlemen, we have to make a decision, time is running out!” Chris [lights another cig]: “I know, I know… so it’s down to Oswego, Trinity and Utica, right?” S.T. [calmly]: “In critical moments, men sometimes see exactly what they wish to see and I’m seeing an alternative option.” Montgomery: “And what might that be?” S.T.: “If we select Marian so as to avoid having to make a most difficult decision, one could not argue our choice of a 7-5 split. This is logically a fairer solution. Chris: “Excellent reasoning! Then there’d be no gloating and infighting amongst themselves, they’d focus their attacks not on us but on Marian whom they probably know little about since their hockey knowledge is mostly centered in the East.” James [animated]: “Yes, this is absolutely brilliant. So, do we have consensus on selecting Marian under the auspices that this year a 7-5 split is better than 8-4? Everyone [standing up]: “Aye!” [Everyone shake hands, pat each other on backs. Doors slide open, room empties, fade to black.]
Scene: [Heavy smoke filled room. Camera pans back enabling viewers to discern a table and a handful of men, some with hands on head, some punching computer keys.] Man #1 [James, staring into monitor]: “Ok, so the primary criteria metrics favor Oswego for the last pool C slot.” Man #2 [Leonard]: “Dammit Jim, we’re humans, not computers and a few of us have trouble with a team getting in while losing their last three on home ice while only scoring one goal late in the last game.” Man #3 [S.T.]: “Agreed, computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them. Logic and practical information do not seem to mesh here but what other answer is there? Trinity? They failed just as well.” Man #4 [Montgomery]: “Aye, if they had only won yesterday this would have bloody been a wee bit easier!” Man #5 [Chris]: “What about Utica? They won both regular and post season, beat Salve, had Oswego beat and took Adrian to the wire there.” Montgomery [shaking]: “Aye, the haggis is in the fire for sure!!” James [pounding on table]: “Gentlemen, we have to make a decision, time is running out!” Chris [lights another cig]: “I know, I know… so it’s down to Oswego, Trinity and Utica, right?” S.T. [calmly]: “In critical moments, men sometimes see exactly what they wish to see and I’m seeing an alternative option.” Montgomery: “And what might that be?” S.T.: “If we select Marian so as to avoid having to make a most difficult decision, one could not argue our choice of a 7-5 split. This is logically a fairer solution. Chris: “Excellent reasoning! Then there’d be no gloating and infighting amongst themselves, they’d focus their attacks not on us but on Marian whom they probably know little about since their hockey knowledge is mostly centered in the East.” James [animated]: “Yes, this is absolutely brilliant. So, do we have consensus on selecting Marian under the auspices that this year a 7-5 split is better than 8-4? Everyone [standing up]: “Aye!” [Everyone shake hands, pat each other on backs. Doors slide open, room empties, fade to black.]
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