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Thread: Gender Studies I

  1. #41
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by dxmnkd316 View Post
    My roommate doesn't know how to use a dishwasher. She's helpless. I've come home to a dishwasher that was rubbing with literally two plates in it. When it is full, it's really not. Half the things are facing away from center, there is no organization so half of it is empty when you rearrange, and then top-rack only items are on the bottom.

    If I try to explain how to use a dishwasher, that's going to be considered mansplaining. Right?
    I explained how to load a dishwasher to my nephew once and his father jumped on me for being a condescending jerk. I then demonstrated what he was doing wrong, how to make the most of the space and I was still the jerk rather than simply being helpful. It doesn't matter the gender of the person being helped or your truest of intentions behind giving it, people just don't like receiving help unless they ask for it.
    "The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." George Orwell, 1984

    Women and I have an understanding. They tend to stay away from me, and I tend to understand that I'm repulsive to them. It's not my favorite understanding.

  2. #42
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by St. Clown View Post
    I explained how to load a dishwasher to my nephew once and his father jumped on me for being a condescending jerk. I then demonstrated what he was doing wrong, how to make the most of the space and I was still the jerk rather than simply being helpful. It doesn't matter the gender of the person being helped or your truest of intentions behind giving it, people just don't like receiving help unless they ask for it.
    This.

    This is why "mansplaining" is an insulting term. It's sexist. Roll with it if you want, but Imma gonna call you out.
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  3. #43
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by Kepler View Post
    No, women are just as good at that as men.
    So what, exactly, is the definition? To me it sounds like it's when a man explains something to a woman that he assumes she doesn't know.

    Every human being is guilty of this. When Mike Pence's plane slid off the runway in LGA...an ops guy (who can be condescending, at times) in PIT asked me if I knew who Mike Pence was (I live in Indiana). Would that have been "mansplaining" if I had been a woman? If so, why is it called something different?

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  4. #44
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by MinnesotaNorthStar View Post
    So what, exactly, is the definition? To me it sounds like it's when a man explains something to a woman that he assumes she doesn't know.
    I'm sure I do this more often that I like to think--explain things to my wife, my secretary, or my friends things which I have good reason to know they already understand. I suspect they often think I'm a harmless fool when I do it, but sometimes it must be aggravating. A holdover behavior from a time when we excluded women from wide areas of knowledge, such as business and politics. And still do to a degree.

    I can't think of times when I've done it sitting here, but I plan to ask my wife tonight, and I am willing to bet she will have a better memory. But to make sure I get to score at least one point in this mismatch, I will first explain to her what mansplaining is and how it is commonplace.

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by burd View Post
    I'm sure I do this more often that I like to think--explain things to my wife, my secretary, or my friends things which I have good reason to know they already understand. I suspect they often think I'm a harmless fool when I do it, but sometimes it must be aggravating. A holdover behavior from a time when we excluded women from wide areas of knowledge, such as business and politics. And still do to a degree.

    I can't think of times when I've done it sitting here, but I plan to ask my wife tonight, and I am willing to bet she will have a better memory. But to make sure I get to score at least one point in this mismatch, I will first explain to her what mansplaining is and how it is commonplace.
    I do it far less now that I'm aware of it, but we all do it. The best way to self-examine is to ask your female loved ones. If you have few female loved ones , watch yourself when you interact with a woman and imagine you are interacting with a man. Typically, one's behavior is different. It's not that a man is necessarily more deferential to a man, but he's far less "I am demonstrating my self-assurance here."

    Women are trained to be hens and men are trained to be cocks. This is very useful in the right circumstances, but in the workplace the women we meet aren't being hens and they have not requested that we be cocks.
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  6. #46

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by MinnesotaNorthStar View Post
    So what, exactly, is the definition? To me it sounds like it's when a man explains something to a woman that he assumes she doesn't know.
    The formal definition is that it's explaining in a way that is patronizing, but I don't think that captures it exactly, particularly for someone resistant to the concept.

    I'll give it a shot. Note: you asked, so I'm not (at least intentionally) patronizing you.

    Let's say you and I disagree on something. I try to remedy this disagreement not by stating my supporting argument but by reiterating my opinion and explaining each of the terms. Mansplaining is the rhetorical equivalent of trying to communicate with somebody who speaks Chinese by still speaking English to them only slowly and more loudly. It misses the point and the assumptions that underlie the behavior are ignorant and kinda offensive. The fact that it's unconscious and the speaker doesn't intend to be an as-s, and would probably be mortified if he realized what he was doing, make it that much more depressing.

    If you have doubts whether this is an empirically observed phenomenon, ask any woman. Particularly women who are more accomplished, but all women to some extent, have to navigate this. It's just another male behavior (constant sexual objectification sheesh give it a rest buddy I'm not interested, having their fragile egos threatened by a confident and decisive woman and getting called and treated as a b-tch for it, etc) that makes women's lives more difficult than ours -- Ginger having to dance in high heels backwards.
    Last edited by Kepler; 11-18-2016 at 06:57 AM.
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    http://jezebel.com/becoming-ugly-1789622154

    I have no idea what to make of this or the comments section.

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Mansplaining is definitely an issue women in the hockey community have taken issue with. I gotta imagine some of the women who post here have experienced it first hand.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dxmnkd316 View Post
    http://jezebel.com/becoming-ugly-1789622154

    I have no idea what to make of this or the comments section.
    That's a little much for me.
    I tried to say earlier in this thread that most of us women knew exactly what it meant to be "mansplained" (and this was right after I'd just gone through a terrible car buying experience).

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by dxmnkd316 View Post
    http://jezebel.com/becoming-ugly-1789622154

    I have no idea what to make of this or the comments section.
    Yowza. Whole lot going on there.
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  11. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spartanforlife4 View Post
    Yowza. Whole lot going on there.
    I couldn't even finish reading it

  12. #52
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    I read a lot of articles on Jezebel to try and gain a better understanding of feminism and gender issues. Then every so often they post an article like this and I really get put off from it. Maybe that's a terrible place to go to read about those topics. I have no idea.

    Are there a lot of women who feel like what this article describes? I really hope not, especially since they seem to paint (with a fairly wide brush) a picture that somewhere between most and all men are monsters. Maybe that's true, because again, I have no idea.

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by Deutsche Gopher Fan View Post
    I couldn't even finish reading it
    I guess this summarizes everything I need to know about the article.

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    You’ve accurately described the day to day humiliation of living inside a woman’s body. The good men are still trying to force us to believe we’ll be ok, which feels like an even greater assault than those actively assaulting us.
    I... I don't know...

    This seems to convey there is some type of battle, yet no way to win. What's the fight about, why is there even a battle, if those on your side are considered worse than the enemy?
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  15. #55
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by Deutsche Gopher Fan View Post
    I couldn't even finish reading it
    I'm glad I'm not the only one.
    "The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." George Orwell, 1984

    Women and I have an understanding. They tend to stay away from me, and I tend to understand that I'm repulsive to them. It's not my favorite understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by St. Clown View Post
    I'm glad I'm not the only one.
    And I'm a woman.

  17. #57
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by Deutsche Gopher Fan View Post
    And I'm a woman.
    I cry like one.
    "The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." George Orwell, 1984

    Women and I have an understanding. They tend to stay away from me, and I tend to understand that I'm repulsive to them. It's not my favorite understanding.

  18. #58
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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by St. Clown View Post
    I cry like one.
    I just roar once in a while. /oldreference
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    Quote Originally Posted by dxmnkd316 View Post
    I read a lot of articles on Jezebel to try and gain a better understanding of feminism and gender issues. Then every so often they post an article like this and I really get put off from it. Maybe that's a terrible place to go to read about those topics. I have no idea.

    Are there a lot of women who feel like what this article describes? I really hope not, especially since they seem to paint (with a fairly wide brush) a picture that somewhere between most and all men are monsters. Maybe that's true, because again, I have no idea.
    I don't think many women feel that extreme. I mean I'm a flaming liberal female and I can't read that crap. That's the equivalent of watching Fox News and feeling informed

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    Re: Gender Studies I

    Quote Originally Posted by Deutsche Gopher Fan View Post
    I don't think many women feel that extreme. I mean I'm a flaming liberal female and I can't read that crap. That's the equivalent of watching Fox News and feeling informed
    What I found more disturbing than the story was the comments all seemed to echo the author's (I haven't read them all nor do I intend to, but there are hundreds). Some of them were worse. One commenter even said she recommended the readers get fat to become invisible.

    There's probably a better place to get perspective. You're probably right.

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