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A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

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  • #16
    Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

    Big thumbs up for this thread.

    Comment


    • #17
      Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

      Met a French guy today. I asked him if he knew any German. He said no. I said, "You're welcome."

      Adam was strolling around Eden, and came across an elephant. They exchanged pleasantries, and the elephant said, "I have a question. How do you breath through that thing?"
      Never really developed a taste for tequila. Kind of hard to understand how you make a drink out of something that sharp, inhospitable. Now, bourbon is easy to understand.
      Tastes like a warm summer day. -Raylan Givens

      Comment


      • #18
        Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

        Pirate walks into a bar, has a steering wheel sticking out of his pants.
        Bartender says, "Hey buddy, you know you got a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?"
        Pirate says, "Aye, 'tis drivin' me nuts!!"
        What kind of cheese are you planning to put on top?

        Comment


        • #19
          Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

          What does a gay horse eat?

          Hayyyyyyyyyyyy!
          Never really developed a taste for tequila. Kind of hard to understand how you make a drink out of something that sharp, inhospitable. Now, bourbon is easy to understand.
          Tastes like a warm summer day. -Raylan Givens

          Comment


          • #20
            Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

            I've got a great Ebola joke, but y'all probably won't get it.
            Never really developed a taste for tequila. Kind of hard to understand how you make a drink out of something that sharp, inhospitable. Now, bourbon is easy to understand.
            Tastes like a warm summer day. -Raylan Givens

            Comment


            • #21
              Originally posted by rufus View Post
              Pirate walks into a bar, has a steering wheel sticking out of his pants.
              Bartender says, "Hey buddy, you know you got a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?"
              Pirate says, "Aye, 'tis drivin' me nuts!!"
              What's a pirate's favorite letter?

              You'd think it'd be R but it's really the C!

              What's a pirate's favorite part about knitting?

              The yarrrrrrrrrrrrn!
              U-A-A!!!Go!Go!GreenandGold!
              Applejack Tells You How UAA Is Doing...
              I spell Failure with UAF

              Originally posted by UAFIceAngel
              But let's be real...There are 40 some other teams and only two alaskan teams...the day one of us wins something big will be the day I transfer to UAA
              Originally posted by Doyle Woody
              Best sign by a visting Seawolf fan Friday went to a young man who held up a piece of white poster board that read: "YOU CAN'T SPELL FAILURE WITHOUT UAF."

              Comment


              • #22
                Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                Alright, I'll sanitize this so I don't get banned.

                Man walks along the street, comes upon a shop selling fruit. Shopkeeper says, "here, try this apple for a buck, it tastes like a banana".
                Man says, "hmm, ok, I'll try it ", takes a big bite, and sure enough, tastes like a banana. Shopkeeper says, "turn it around"
                Man does, takes another bite, and says, "wow, this tastes like a pear"

                Shopkeeper moves closer, whispers in his ear. "Tell you what, you come out back, and for $5, I've got an apple that tastes like vagina"
                Man gives him the five bucks, follows him into the back. Shopkeeper hands him an apple, guy takes a big bite and immediately spits it out.
                "This tastes like chit!!!"
                "Turn it around"
                What kind of cheese are you planning to put on top?

                Comment


                • #23
                  Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                  Originally posted by busterman62 View Post
                  A seal walks into a club.
                  Shouldn't that be a baby seal?

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                    What's made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones?

                    TROMBONES!
                    the state of hockey is good

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                      Originally posted by state of hockey View Post
                      What's made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones?

                      TROMBONES!
                      Leave.
                      Never really developed a taste for tequila. Kind of hard to understand how you make a drink out of something that sharp, inhospitable. Now, bourbon is easy to understand.
                      Tastes like a warm summer day. -Raylan Givens

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                        Originally posted by state of hockey View Post
                        what's made of brass and sounds like tom jones?

                        Trombones!
                        gtfo

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                          Originally posted by Brenthoven View Post
                          Leave.


                          The bartender says "hey we don't allow time-travelers in here."
                          A time-traveler walks into a bar.

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                            Originally posted by Brenthoven View Post
                            An Irishman walks into a bar.

                            The end.
                            An Irishman walks out of a bar.
                            Truly ... I saw it on the news recently.

                            A scruffy, semi-shredded rope walks into a bar.
                            Bartender says, "sorry, we don't allow ropes in here."
                            To which rope responds, "Rope!?! I'm a frayed knot!"

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                              A man walks into a bar says, "ouch".

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

                                Originally posted by Brenthoven View Post
                                A blind man picked up a hammer and saw....
                                "I see," said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw.

                                If you're gonna tell jokes older than me, at least you could get it right!

                                Originally posted by Jimjamesak View Post
                                Which school is the one that's "5, one to hold the lightbulb and four to drink until the room starts to spin"? I use that one for UAF.
                                I always heard that as Irishmen. The country, not the school
                                bigmrg74: "You can't drink the day away if you don't start early!"
                                SledDog: "UncleRay seems to be the most sensible one here tonight."
                                All great men are dead and I'm not feeling well.
                                A Margarita! in every hand and another Margarita! in the other hand!

                                And stay off the lawn!

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