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Thread: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

  1. #101
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    What do you call a Knight who swears a lot?

    Circus

  2. #102
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by joecct View Post
    If “womb” is pronounced “woom” and “tomb” is pronounced “toom”, shouldn’t “bomb” be pronounced “boom”?
    Come home to Rome, gnome?
    "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

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  3. #103
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.
    Michigan Tech Huskies Pep Band: Drink It In, Maaaaaan.
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  4. #104
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    My teacher threw sodium chloride at me. That's a salt.

  5. #105
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by NEWI Badger Fan View Post
    My teacher threw sodium chloride at me. That's a salt.
    I've hit my fiance with a pair of socks before. Is that socksual assult?

  6. #106
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    A family had two siblings enter religious vocations, a sister and a brother. So if she becomes a nun and he becomes a priest, should the sister call her brother Father?

  7. #107
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiggsy View Post
    A family had two siblings enter religious vocations, a sister and a brother. So if she becomes a nun and he becomes a priest, should the sister call her brother Father?
    and what happens if the sister becomes the leader of her convent? does her brother / Father call his sister Mother Superior?
    "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

    "While I thought it was the light at the end of the tunnel, in reality it was the headlight of an oncoming train."

    "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

  8. #108
    NEVER DIE! ShirtlessBob's Avatar
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Today, I asked my librarian if she had a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.

    She said it rang a bell, but wasn't sure if it was there or not.
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
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    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  9. #109

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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    curlers get to throw rocks at houses
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    Banned from the St. Lawrence University Facebook page - March 2016.

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  10. #110
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Someone told me to stop singing "Wonderwall." I said maybe...
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  11. #111
    NEVER DIE! ShirtlessBob's Avatar
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    "I don't like your tone, mister!"

    And that's how the shootout at the OK Chorale started.
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  12. #112

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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by ShirtlessBob View Post
    "I don't like your tone, mister!"

    And that's how the shootout at the OK Chorale started.
    Somebody has this bass ackwards and will get into a lot of treble because of it!
    CCT '77 & '78
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    ”Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.”
    - Benjamin Franklin

    Banned from the St. Lawrence University Facebook page - March 2016.

    I want to live forever. So far, so good.

  13. #113
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by joecct View Post
    Somebody has this bass ackwards and will get into a lot of treble because of it!

    no doubt there will be some who dislike the tenor of your remark.
    "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

    "While I thought it was the light at the end of the tunnel, in reality it was the headlight of an oncoming train."

    "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

  14. #114

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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by FreshFish View Post
    no doubt there will be some who dislike the tenor of your remark.
    My alto ego disclaims all responsibility.
    CCT '77 & '78
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    ”Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.”
    - Benjamin Franklin

    Banned from the St. Lawrence University Facebook page - March 2016.

    I want to live forever. So far, so good.

  15. #115
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by joecct View Post
    My alto ego disclaims all responsibility.
    Oh, go jump off a cleff.
    The preceding post may contain trigger words and is not safe-space approved.

    North Dakota Hockey:

  16. #116

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Sicatoka View Post
    Oh, go jump off a cleff.
    But I'd be squished flat upon sharp objects!

  17. #117
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by joecct View Post
    But I'd be squished flat upon sharp objects!
    What you see as a major key in this I see as minor.
    The preceding post may contain trigger words and is not safe-space approved.

    North Dakota Hockey:

  18. #118

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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by The Sicatoka View Post
    What you see as a major key in this I see as minor.
    The scales of justice will tip in my favor. Make a note of it!
    CCT '77 & '78
    4 kids
    4 grandsons (BCA 7/09, CJA 5/14, JDL 8/14, JFL 6/16)

    ”Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.”
    - Benjamin Franklin

    Banned from the St. Lawrence University Facebook page - March 2016.

    I want to live forever. So far, so good.

  19. #119
    NEVER DIE! ShirtlessBob's Avatar
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Waldo asked me to spot him at the gym. I just couldn't...
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  20. #120
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Quote Originally Posted by ShirtlessBob View Post
    Waldo asked me to spot him at the gym. I just couldn't...
    Two years ago my wife and I dressed as Waldo and Carmen SanDiego for Halloween. Not only did we win best costumed couple, I managed (dressed as Waldo) to photobomb every picture taken that night.
    Uncle Mickey: July 23, 1950-July 22, 2003

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