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Thread: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

  1. #501
    NEVER DIE! ShirtlessBob's Avatar
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  2. #502
    They ignore ridicule & fight; I win
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Earlier, I was looking at an electrical outlet. Watt a sight.
    It was an honor to present your colors, RPI. Let's Go 'TUTE!
    May 14th, 2011, 11:00 PM ET: 2147483647

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    I'm not happy about it either, but Flag is correct (cue the Twilight Zone music!).
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    Ahh crap I agree exactly with what FlagDude said.
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    I never thought I would say this, but you are right.
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    And yet, even if Flaggy is complete tinfoil hat, every day it looks closer and closer to the truth.
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    So flaggy: you win.

  3. #503
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    I started writing a screen play in hopes of selling it to be made into a movie. It was about a former CIA operative who's daughter gets kidnapped and sold as a sex slave while he goes to rescue her.
    Unfortunately I found out that plot was taken.

    Then I thought well, maybe the CIA guy could get kidnapped by the family of someone he killed earlier and his daughter could help rescue him.
    But that plot was taken too.

  4. #504
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    I tell dad jokes, but I don't have any kids. I'm a faux pa.
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
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  5. #505
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    I'm at a reception, and a South African man of Dutch descent walks into the room. The person next to me sees him, rolls her eyes, and leans over to whisper to me "Don't get trapped in a conversation with him; that guy is such a Boer!"
    "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

    "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

    "Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy." -- W. B. Yeats

  6. #506
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    I was at a party once, and I lost my watch. I looked over, saw some guy harassing a woman while stepping on my watch. So I walked over and punched him in the face, breaking his nose. No one does that to a woman, not on my watch.
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  7. #507
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Charlie Brown and Snoopy were on a flight. Flight attendant walks up to them and says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve Peanuts on this flight."
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  8. #508
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Sheep dog: All 30 sheep are ready, farmer.
    Farmer: But I only count 26.
    Sheep dog: I know; I rounded them up.

    This one is pretty baaad, even by my standards.
    twitter: PipersHouse920
    “Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
    ― Franz Kafka
    269/1,000 miles ran, 0/2,000 on bicycle
    Next race: FUNderwear Run 5K on March 12, Irish Jig 5K on March 18.

  9. #509
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    Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

    Seen on a T-shirt:

    "I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure."
    "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

    "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

    "Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy." -- W. B. Yeats

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