Jared From Subway Needs To Go!

[MSUMaverickFan]

It hit me about two months ago... Jared needs to go! I'm sick of hearing his pathetic acting and his mini lisp telling me about Subway's new lineup. I've become so irritated by Jared that I can't even understand what he's saying, just that HE is saying it. If Jared even came close to having a personality maybe I wouldn't be so hard on the guy. Bottom line is that Jared has had his fame, his well deserved fame :rolleyes: and now it's time for him to drop out of the spotlight and join the celebrity boneyard.

[thecomicbookguy]

What if I think he needs to go and you need counseling?

The only thing that really bothers me about Jared is the way they now make it sound like eating Subway is what caused him to lose the weight. The first commercials pointed out that it was all the walking he had to do to get to Subway, combined with the fact that he was consuming less calories and fat...wait, that sounds like...proper diet and excercise!

[Dude Love]

Isn't that the guy who used to be fat, but now he's just ugly?

[French Rage]

Still lookin good, eatin them sammiches.

[Dirty]

If it makes you feel better, he came to a UND game a couple years ago to drop the puck or something. I booed him mercilessly and told him he sucked. Since I was on the glass, I'm pretty sure he heard me.

Clay Henry went away, why can't this dink? Why is this guy some sort of hero anyways? He lost a bunch of weight by only eating some overpriced, underfilling food and exercising. How is this an accomplishment? How is doing things so you don't die of a heart attack an accomplishment? Do I deserve a medal because when I drive, I don't swerve onto playgrounds and run over small children? Well then why should this guy be given a cookie because he decided to be personally responsible and not slowly kill himself? Do we worships that idiot who eats a Big Mac every single day and has for like 25 years? Heck no! We taunt him as he obviously deserves to be taunted for being such a dork. Jared deserves the same treatment. He's a buffoon. He certainly shouldn't be revered for his penny pinching skills. He must have wasted a crapload of money in the time he was losing weight. I mean going to Subway every freaking day? Way to throw away money. That certainly isn't admirable. If anything it encourages people not to save money. When people don't save money, we all end up having to support them because they become leeches. I certainly don't want to do this, do you? No, you don't. But because of the hero worship of idiots like this guy, we are. Instead of personal responsibility being encouraged, you are encouraged to be a lazy bum because you'll proably be rewarded. Screw that. Jared should just be pushed out of an airplane with a cinder block replacing the parachute in his pack. It would save us all alot of headaches like having to see his moronic commercials like that one that is on currently. 'Hey! Let's do a play on the MLB Senate hearings! That would be so cool!" Ummmm, no it wouldn't. It sucks. It's moronic and annoying, like all things to do with Jared. Why the hell would this guy testify about this? I mean seriously? It doesn't make any sense. They should redo the commercial and have a guy interrupt the hearings by barging in with a baseball bat which he uses to beat Jared and all the hearing members senseless.

Then there is that stupid commercial where the moron compares the Subway grill chicken sub to the fried chicken sandwiches at McDonalds/Burger King. This is a completely ridiculous comparision given that both McDonalds and Burger King have a grilled chicken sandwich, which would be much more accurate. Of course then Subway wouldn't be better for you or at least it would be close. No crap the sub has less calories and fat in it, IT'S NOT FRIED! If we are going to make moronic comparisons like that, how about I compare the salads at McDonalds to the the Steak sub slathered with mayo, oil, salad dressing and bacon at Subway? Speaking of all that slathered mayo, they include that in the calories/fat for the sandwiches at McDonalds/Burger King, but don't have it on their grilled sub. Gee, way to make a valid comparison. If you put all sorts of extra crap on one thing, of course it isn't going to be as good for you. If you put six pounds of lard on a Ritz cracker, it'll be worse for you then a big piece of cake. It's common sense, you buttheads. Quit making commercials that are all but complete lies and perhaps your point might actually have merit. As it is though, you're just all a bunch of lying twitberries and deserve to be hit in the face with a trident.

You need a fourth option that says "Needs to be injected with a flesh eating virus".

[Brenthoven]

Classic Dirty.

[St. Clown]

And Dirty thanks you for this thread. :)

[IanAtKDR]

Considering how much they resemble each other, I want Jared and the "can you hear me now?" guy from Verizon Wireless to have a public fight to the death. I'd pay top dollar for tickets! :p

[whiplash529]

Still lookin good, eatin them sammiches.
His name is Jared. Jared lost weight eating Subway and ... sandwiches of

Yes, it is my hope that every beautiful child on this earth has aides by next month! Aides for everyone!!


ian: i like the idea. afterwards the winner is rewarded with a one way ticket to a nice, yukon territory vacation!

[Zudnic]

If it bothers you so much, you can do the following:

1. Open MS Word.
2. Type:
Dear Subway:

Your spokesman Jared irriates me so much that I will refuse to patronize your stores as long as I see him in your advertising.

Sincerely,
MSUMaverickFan
3. Hit print
4. Mail

[HockeyBum]

Clay Henry went away, why can't this dink?

I could've gone without you bringing up Clay Henry. It's been like 3 years and I can STILL remember that stupid song. I curse Subway to this very day. :mad:

[thecomicbookguy]

I didn't mind Clay Henry all that much. He only had one commercial, I can't even remember the song, and the dude is a fireman. I gotta respect that.

Dirty's post, as well as being a refreshing look back at "classic Dirty", hits it spot on. Everything about this guy being a spokesman is ludicrous.

[Hammer]

If it makes you feel better, he came to a UND game a couple years ago to drop the puck or something. I booed him mercilessly and told him he sucked. Since I was on the glass, I'm pretty sure he heard me.

Clay Henry went away, why can't this dink?...

Then there is that stupid commercial ...


Oh man...

BTW, Jared's gotta go. This guy's gonna go Oprah on us and weigh 425 pounds in about 5 years.

[walrus]

Way to throw away money. ".

Jared can throw away money and still buy and sell you. Jealous much??

[Dirty]

Jared can throw away money and still buy and sell you. Jealous much??

No, I'm annoyed. This guy is made out to be some sort of near deity because he decided to get off his duff and do something. Wow, that's a true accomplishment. No wait, it isn't. It's what non-lazy tub of goo does every day. Heck even some tubs of goo do it also.

[MSUMaverickFan]

No, I'm annoyed. This guy is made out to be some sort of near deity because he decided to get off his duff and do something. Wow, that's a true accomplishment. No wait, it isn't. It's what non-lazy tub of goo does every day. Heck even some tubs of goo do it also.

Oh god, just got done reading your post. Dirty you spit the truth.

[BigPieps]

Jared wants everyone to have AID(E)S

[mattyt02]

Jared wants everyone to have AID(E)S

Everyone has AIDS.

[French Rage]

I could've gone without you bringing up Clay Henry. It's been like 3 years and I can STILL remember that stupid song. I curse Subway to this very day. :mad:

His name is Henry, Clay Henry, he's a Subway man and a Jared fan,
Got real big eating burgers and fries,
Now he's down to a smaller size.

[Dude Love]

His name is Henry, Clay Henry, he's a Subway man and a Jared fan,
Got real big eating burgers and fries,
Now he's down to a smaller size.

Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!